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1. Listen without fixing.
Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is to just listen without rushing in with advice. Let them feel heard.
2. Believe them.
Validate their experience. Believe what they tell you, even if it’s hard to hear.
3. Offer specific help.
Instead of “Let me know if you need anything,” try “Can I bring you dinner?” or “Want me to walk your dog?” Specific offers lift the burden of decision-making.
4. Respect their timeline.
Healing, grieving, processing—it’s all on their schedule, not yours. Let them move at their own pace.
5. Check in regularly.
Even a simple “I’m thinking about you” text can be a lifeline. Consistent, gentle presence matters more than perfect words.
6. Accept their messiness.
Tears, silence, anger, numbness—it’s all part of it. Don’t make them feel they need to package their pain neatly for you.
7. Protect their privacy.
If someone shares their struggle with you, hold it tenderly. It’s not your story to tell.
8. Don’t center yourself.
Be mindful not to hijack the conversation with your own experiences. Right now, it’s about them.
9. Be patient with repetitions.
Sometimes people need to tell the same story over and over as part of healing. Listen as if it’s the first time, every time.
10. Remind them they’re loved.
Not by trying to fix them—but by showing up, staying, witnessing. Sometimes love looks like simply being there, holding the space.
Klavdija